Prema in Sanskrit translates to "divine love". Prema Soul was created from the fabric of a thousand stories, carefully woven together into a grand and divine design. It was born from a place of great sorrow, and even greater love. And it continues to evolve from the constant and palpable healing journey that remains at the center of my being.
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I am an empath. I was born with the gift of feeling, and the ability to help others heal on an emotional and spiritual level. I guess part of me always knew this about myself, but for most of my life it felt to me like I was cursed. I felt different from others around me. I felt like I didn’t belong. My emotional sensitivity was often mocked and my kindness was often taken advantage of. My empathy kept me vulnerable to abuse throughout my life. I not only attracted and openly accepted the abuse of others, I learned at a very early age to master the art of self-abuse and self-hatred. Depression, suicidal thoughts, severe anxiety, panic attacks, and self-medicating kept me in survival mode for years, as I worked tirelessly to reject and suppress who I am.
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Despite the allure of anything and everything spiritual, my natural inclination to see signs and synchronicities everywhere, my ability to feel others' emotions as if they were my own, and my desire to play with crystals and tarot cards, I sought normalcy. Straight A student, success in a socially accepted career as an English teacher, a normal house, a normal family = PERFECT life right? But running away from who I was only led to immense suffering, because in the end, none of us can escape our true nature.
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And the nature of the empath is compassion, love, understanding, and forgiveness. But many of us allow the barrage of outside energy to permeate and hijack us. Empaths must learn to embrace their healing superpowers, and use them instead to shift the energy around them. Once an empath learns how to harness this prana or ki, they become an unstoppable force with unlimited potential.
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There was nothing special that caused the initial shift in me, other than utter exhaustion. I just know that I decided… no more. It came with this thought… Today is the day I change my life. Today is the day I start accepting and loving who I am. And I did everything in my power to learn how to help myself reset, reprogram, and heal the damage that had been done. I did A LOT of work. A LOT. It came in the form of a dedicated yoga and meditation practice which led to me becoming a certified yoga teacher. Energy healing that led to me becoming a Reiki Master. And a ton of other healing modalities, self-help books, therapy, courses and certifications. This was my awakening, slow and steady. I could see clearly, but I was trying to fit the awakened ME into the life I created from old patterns, old behaviors, old ways of thinking, and old ways of being. I was misaligned. I wasn’t living from a place of pure truth and pure purpose, and I knew it. But I wasn’t yet brave enough to leap.
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My courage came in the form of a phone call that shattered my heart and forever changed the course of my life. My little brother, Heath, had taken something laced with Fentanyl, went into cardiac arrest, and was in the ICU in an induced coma. The next 6 months are vividly etched into my mind as a million fractured pieces of memory as my brother fought for his life and my family struggled with the decision to let him go.
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He was conscious, but he could not speak or move or breathe on his own. So, I had to lean into my empathic gifts to communicate with him. I gave him Reiki therapy every day. I listened for messages and guidance. I trusted my intuition. I let go of control. I opened myself to the flow of the universe. I allowed myself to surrender to the reality of the HERE and NOW. And I learned to accept what is. I had no choice. Heath left this earth at 5pm on April 10, 2022 surrounded by his family, my Reiki hands holding his heart as he took his last breath.
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In the absence of certainty, there exists an abundance of possibility. My little brother gave me the courage to resign from a career that was draining me. He gave me the courage to leap head first into the unknown. He inspired me to travel halfway across the world to rediscover myself, to heal my grieving heart, and to find my way back home to me. And now, I continue this journey of surrender every single day. I go wherever I am intuitively led. I follow my heart. I trust that the universe has my back, and that I am being guided. I know who I am, and I AM, unapologetically.
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I have now devoted my life to teaching other empaths, intuitives, and souls drawn to the yogic path what I learned, and to help them on their journey of awakening. I teach them how to channel life-force energy to create impenetrable boundaries and protective barriers around themselves and those they love. I teach them how to prioritize what matters and how not to waste energy on what doesn’t. I teach them how to cultivate and maintain peace within their being as well as in their relationships. I teach them to let go of what no longer serves them. I teach them how to manifest beautiful and joyful life experiences. I teach them how to take their power back and to stand in their truth. I hold up a mirror so they may see themselves for who they truly are. I show them how to harness their empathic superpowers so that they may be a beacon to light the way for others.